Saima Ikram
For a healthy relationship, it is important to maintain personal integrity. In order to explain to people what they are and what you expect from them, you need to set personal boundaries. You cannot tolerate people who do not understand where you end and they begin. People who try to invade your space and push the limits of your boundaries affect you and your work. Therefore, you need to not only know your boundaries but also need to set them.
Following are the ways for setting your boundaries straight:
Create a boundary chart:
For your own self, you need to define what your limits are with strangers, colleagues, family, and friends. For this purpose, examine the discomfort you faced previously while encountering such people. You may not have realized at that time but your limits have been crossed to make you feel uncomfortable. Make a chart and outline each boundary per each relationship. Then fill it in with boundary criteria that you feel comfortable. This chart will help you asses when someone will be overstepping your boundary.
Become assertive:
When it comes to setting boundaries, you need to be upfront about your own requirements while keeping the rights, needs, and wants of others in mind. It will help you to become more self-confident and you will gain a better understanding of who you are and the value you have to offer.
Practice to tell people when they cross the boundaries:
Until and unless you tell people what limits you have set for them, they will keep crossing the boundaries. It will only lead to resentment and confusion in the end, therefore, practice pointing out to people when they cross their limits. You may be afraid that people will take you as rude but affirming your boundaries means that you value your own needs and feelings more than the opinions of others.
Ignore the ones who do not follow:
When people don’t respect your boundaries, then it is your right to ignore them or remove them from your life. Remind yourself that how valuable you are and anyone who doesn’t value that should space away from you.
