Saima Ikram
At times we are caught in a tug-of-war between who we think we are and who we should be in our life. This makes us think again and again what we want to be and what we are able to accomplish. This leaves us at the mercy of our guilt demons which prevents us from taking care of ourselves and expects something unrealistic of our own self. Guilt is a major roadblock to our success especially when it settles in for a long time. Instead of adding any constructive to our life, guilt shadows the good things in our life and cuts down our energy and our self-worth.
Following are the steps you can take in order to banish your guilt demons once and for all:
Set yourself free from the borrowed beliefs:
Most of the times your guilt is because of the beliefs you have set in your mind. Ask yourself that something that you want to do is it worthy of being done by you? Ask what society says about it and how your family reacts to it? Once you get the answer, have the courage to believe your own judgment. Believe that what you think and feel comfortable in is the right thing to do and there is nothing to be guilty about it.
Be aware of the consequences:
For setting yourself free from the guilt, you need to understand what will go wrong if you did what you actually want. If anything goes wrong then be prepared to deal with it. For example, if you order something to eat makes you fall off from your diet wagon, then must know how to counterbalance it. You should know how much exercise you will have to do in order to remain on your diet scale.
Be kind to yourself:
When you want to do something you really want, you also make mistakes. This is surely something you are not proud of but that does not mean you can be hard on yourself. You must learn to forgive yourself for the wrong turns you have taken. Try to talk yourself as if you were another person and what someone else could have done in your position. Forgive yourself and talk to someone else in order to lighten the burden of your guilt.
Get rid of your guilt:
After spending so much time trying to heal your inner self, you must get rid of the guilt as soon as possible. In order to get the guilt completely out from your life; make some strong rituals to stick to. Write a positive letter or affirmations to yourself and throw away the paper in which you have confessed your guilt. This will help you not to allow those guilt feelings in your life again.
Replace negative voice:
Guilt feelings arise when you are unable to do something perfectly. But you need to understand that humans are not at all perfect and you should appreciate yourself for being able to do what you have done. Replace all the negative feelings with positive ones and you will feel a lot better.
Be responsible:
When something goes wrong, do not deny it, instead accept your mistakes. Focus on what went wrong and learn from the lessons so that you can prevent them in future. When you reflect on your mistakes, it makes you smarter and wiser. It helps to build a constructive change in your personality and frees you from the guilt pattern.
