Hisham Sarwar
For living a healthy life, it is important to set healthy boundaries. It is a skill to set and sustain boundaries as it requires a complete understanding of what your limits are. Setting boundaries determines whether others can make fun of you or take advantage of your good nature. You may consider that you need to keep adjusting those boundaries in order to fit each relationship but it is more about yourself. You need to first set boundaries for your own values and that they shouldn’t be fluid.
Following are the few ways you can set better boundaries for yourself:
Measure self-esteem:
Boundaries are a measure of self-esteem but sadly, many of the people don’t even know their own boundaries. When you set boundaries for yourself, it means you give respect to your own values. Valuing your own values will make others respect you as well. Boundaries are a way to understand your self-esteem and how to make it better.
Become clear on what is important:
For setting boundaries, you need to understand what is most important for you. Once you become clear on what things are priorities and what other things are not, you will better be able to sustain your boundaries. In order to decrease the stress of adjusting boundaries for each relationship, understand what things you need to avoid in order for getting what you want.
Change yourself:
You cannot control the actions of other people neither you are responsible for what they do. But what you can do is that you can change yourself. You can easily change your ways according to the new situations when you realize the old ones no longer work.
Be prepared for the consequences:
Once you settle the boundaries for yourself, and then also keep the consequences of not breaking those boundaries. In this way people will realize that they have stepped out of their limit when you will block them. The best way is to sit down quietly with yourself and make it all about your own needs.
Let your behavior do the talking:
Instead of telling others about your boundaries through words, keep a behavior that makes other people understand that there is a limit that they cannot cross. When you will ignore everything that comes in clash with your set boundaries, you will live a much better life without caring for others.
Be honest:
When you set boundaries for yourself then clearly communicate them through your actions. When you will have an authentic character, you will be less afraid of people’s reactions. The more you will ground yourself with the values you have set, the more other people will be bound to respect them.
