Hina Javed Malik
In life, you learn lessons,
And sometimes you learn them the hard way.
Sometimes you learn them too late.
A person younger than our age, it might be our brother or a cousin, often reminds us a lot about ourselves at that age. It was the time when we were trying to figure out life. We think it would have been very much easier if we had known all secrets that we now know. These secrets do not include winning lottery numbers, it includes valuable life advice that was not known to us at that time. Time passed much more quickly than we ever realized, sometimes we badly regret things we didn’t do and the time we wasted on useless activities.
Even if we do say that we should let go of the past but our past is a collection of experiences called “Lessons”. Life teaches us to live and embrace those lessons. When we see a person younger than us, we wish we could tell them all the lessons that we learned too late in life so that he/she does not deal with their life as we did.
It feels better to guide people to make better decisions in life by learning the lessons on time or it becomes too late when there is no looking back. The following are things to keep in mind,
Live in the present moment:
“Do not dwell in the past; do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment”. Buddha.
Most of us do not live fully in the present, because unconsciously we believe that our next moment is more important. And sometimes we keep regretting things that happened in our past, the opportunities we didn’t avail ourselves. But in this whole situation, we miss our whole life by not concentrating on our present.
We do not realize that the present moment is all we ever have and we should just divert all our efforts to making it the primary focus of our life. Present is not an obstacle that you just want to overcome, it is life in itself. You get happiness when you actually start living in the present.
Take control of your life:
“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself”. George Bernard Shaw
You have a right to live your life the way you want to. Although there always will be people who will expect something different from you. Those people often make us think about the things we didn’t do and keep our minds busy with regrets. Don’t explain yourself to others and live life the way you want to. Set your own rules, do the work that you want to do, and do not waste your life away.
Do not make things harder than they really are:
For some pseudo-psychological reasons, humans love to make things harder than they actually are. There are many things about which we only assume that they are difficult whereas in reality there is a much different case. Our brain is built to forget things that are just assumptions and focus on just what is important. So eliminate all the unnecessary things that have occupied space in your brain and focus on the realities.
Let go of your fears:
“He who is not every day conquering some fear has not learnt the secrets of life”’. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Fears of our life keep us focused on the past or make us worried about the future. The reason why successful people stay above the rest of the people is that they move through their fears in order to reach their goals. Because fears grip our mind, body, and spirit and do not let us take risks to follow our dreams in life. Learn to dissipate fear and do the things that make you frightened. When you will face your fear, you will build the courage to pass on your fear.
Remember the “Tortoise”:
The story “Tortoise and the Hare” may be criticized for the tortoise is so slow. The hare at first started ahead but became too confident of his abilities that he will surely win that he preferred taking rest and fell asleep. But the tortoise, on the other hand, concentrated on the finish line and never lost hope. The hare woke up and found the tortoise across the finish line. The moral of the story is “slow and steady wins the race”.
If you want to succeed in life then start taking smaller steps. Focus on your goal and do not lose hope if things do not happen quickly. You will not learn any lessons in life until you go through all the experiences at a slow pace.
Let go of what other people think:
You feel a burden lift if you let go of what others think. Other people are not interested in your actions, appearance, and thoughts because they have a lot on their own plate. Therefore do not assume judgment of others and live the life you have been dreaming about.
Gratitude and appreciation:
Be grateful for what you have, it will make you more satisfied, happier, less depressed, and less stressed. Practice gratitude in your life and you will stay happier forever. Do not take things that you have for granted and think about the people who do not have such blessings in life.
“Make it a habit to tell people thank you, to express your appreciation, sincerely and without the expectation of anything in return. Truly appreciate those around you, and you’ll soon find many others around you. Truly appreciate life, and you’ll find that you have more of it”. Ralph Marston.
